This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I party with great urgency now.
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