Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  My new storm is the chrons

  (248): View more from Michigan

  The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one

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  (248): My new storm is the chrons (248): The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one<div>(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one</div> http://tfl.nu/7nnd
  Replies (5) Good night (1783) Bad night (586)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.

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  (706): the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not. http://tfl.nu/av9b
  Replies (10) Good night (5372) Bad night (544) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.

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  (317): she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know. http://tfl.nu/4052
  Replies (16) Good night (1097) Bad night (5629) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day

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  (513): Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day http://tfl.nu/hc9r
  Replies (3) Good night (2468) Bad night (701) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.

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  (281): thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone. http://tfl.nu/c518
  Replies (7) Good night (3232) Bad night (734) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.

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  (612): Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor. http://tfl.nu/6ksu
  Replies (9) Good night (3602) Bad night (700) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.

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  (317): The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics. http://tfl.nu/667h
  Replies (7) Good night (3335) Bad night (640) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed

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  (215): For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed http://tfl.nu/2i1h
  Replies (1) Good night (1187) Bad night (412) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?

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  (978): The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up... (978): Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis? http://tfl.nu/mb06
  Replies (12) Good night (1347) Bad night (3258)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)

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  (773): Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:) http://tfl.nu/gxuq
  Replies (2) Good night (1261) Bad night (331) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.

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  (906): Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists. http://tfl.nu/e9b4
  Replies (3) Good night (868) Bad night (719) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.

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  (315): My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off. http://tfl.nu/m48w
  Replies (7) Good night (2400) Bad night (382) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....

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  (253): Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse.... http://tfl.nu/k31y
  Replies (6) Good night (605) Bad night (170) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.

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  (630): no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man. http://tfl.nu/w6gc
  Replies (9) Good night (367) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place

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  (+44): Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place http://tfl.nu/6f1z
  Replies (3) Good night (691) Bad night (131) Order T-Shirt

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