well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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