He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize