im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
So much rum. So many feels.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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