it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize