I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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