Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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