You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize