Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
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Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
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