ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize