it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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