i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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