You're my little dorito
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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