I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize