forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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