Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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