So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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