Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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