So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize