whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Pants are for mortals
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize