since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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