I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize