Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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