college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
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I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
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I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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