Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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