Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the knife in your bed.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize