Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
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