Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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