went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
i out mim tonsoeep
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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