I'm drive I can fine osifer
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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