How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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