The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
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