Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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