Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
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I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
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If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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