They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Randomize