Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I had to cum in my sink.
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