Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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