If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs sedatives and a leash
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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