This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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