so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
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You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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