just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize