home. puking in laundry basket.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Still dying that you shit outside
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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