So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
And then he peed in my hair
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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