At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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