A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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