The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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