ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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