I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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