I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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